Protect your child from anxiety during coronavirus outbreak

Published: March 20, 2020

Dear all,

Due to the rapid spread of the COVID-19, we all found ourselves in an unfamiliar and confusing situation. Our beliefs about safety, predictability, social and health services, government responsibility, etc. have been shaken. The lack of reliable information makes things much worse. Parents, of course, carry an additional burden of making decisions and trying to protect not only themselves but their children as well. They feel responsible to ensure there are enough food, medications and other life-critical supplies. They feel compelled to constantly check the news, even though it is clear that even the most trusted sources cannot provide reliable information. In this challenging and confusing situation, few people stop to think about the psychological effects of these events on their children.

I would like to remind parents that the psychological trauma caused by a perceived threat and widespread panic can be long-lasting and damaging, perhaps more so than the actual illness. So, while you are doing your best trying to protect your children from the virus and to ensure they have everything they need, please take a moment to think about how to support them emotionally and to minimize the risk of future psychological problems.

• Limit your child’s exposure to media. This includes limiting your own exposure as well, especially in the presence of your children. Children are keen observers: if they see you spending twice as much time as before on your phone or computer, it will add to their sense of danger. Ask your child not to read/ watch any information about this topic at this time due to an abundance of misinformation, and inform them that you will be checking their browsing history. This applies to adolescents too.

• Do not take your child to grocery stores. The sight of anxious buyers and empty shelves will not make them feel good. If you decide to stock on food, do it inconspicuously and try to store it away from the kids’ eyes. Remember, children trust and remember visual cues. Visual images have a much bigger effect than verbal reassurances.

• Make sure you and your spouse remain calm, confident, and positive. If you need to discuss issues related to the virus or to express your own feelings, do it in private. Use your coping resources to deal with your own anxiety. Consider meditation, prayer, online counselling, nature walks, etc.

• Try to stick to the daily routine. Everyone’s normal routine has been changed. However, try to create a new routine and stick to it. Consider posting a daily schedule. This will create a sense of control and predictability.

• Talk to kids about the virus. Many children will not approach their parents with questions especially if they see that the parents are stressed out. This does not mean they are not worried. Ask them how they feel about the situation, whether they have any questions or feelings they’d like to share. Provide them with general information, but avoid conveying a sense of confusion and helplessness. Demonstrate that it is possible to be OK even when we do not know what’s going to happen. Your job is to listen to their concerns and provide emotional support, not to resolve the situation.

• Spend more time together as a family. Together think of the different activities your kids would enjoy and make a daily plan. Consider family games, cooking, art and crafts projects, movies, nature walks, physical games and exercise at home or outdoors, reading, putting up family shows or making videos, tidying up and cleaning together, etc.

• Facilitate your kids’ online interactions with friends and relatives. Social isolation can lead to feelings of sadness and loneliness.

• Stick to your regular home rules and expectations.